HAPPY NEW YEAR 2021

 HAPPY NEW YEAR

This has been the year of change...  isolation for some...  growth for others... sickness, loss and loneliness for many...  we are here to shout WE ARE ALIVE as this difficult year finally comes to a close...  

There have been lessons to learn...  families to appreciate...  friends to miss...  masks to wear... dry skin from constant hand washing...  moments of unbridled joy and times of crushing sadness...  missed birthdays and weddings...  summers of outdoor small gatherings and holidays apart.  

We haven’t all made it through to the other side.  Let those of us who have  take a moment to remember the 1,800,000 folks who have passed from covid worldwide...  344,000 right here in America...  as we move forward with hope into 2021.  

Here’s to a vastly better year ahead...  a new administration...  a new vaccine to help against covid...  and most importantly...  hope...  to each of us...  a wish...  may you have enough...  cheers to 2021 🥂🍾❤️

Tools... Ever Present in Our Lives... Giving Us Hope

 What is it about remembering to use our tools that is so difficult? 

We learn them...  we practice them...  we are committed to making real changes in our lives...  visible improvement happens.  And yet... as time passes we seem to forget how important practicing and using our tools truly is for our recovery to not just continue...  but to grow and blossom.  

Maybe we get a little cocky...  we have been working on ourselves diligently for a long time.   We have seen and experienced substantial improvement in our relationships.  We have grown beyond our last guide post.  We are cured!  How true is the saying...  man makes plans, God laughs?   

And then it happens...   something unexpected...  and we find ourselves repeating old dysfunctional patterns...  running around the same codependent drama triangle.   But this time it IS different.  We can SEE the reality of our situation much sooner...   before we go all the way down the chasm again we are able to slam on the brakes...  take a deep breath and STOP.  

We are capable of looking in the mirror...  seeing how we have so casually stepped back from our path... momentarily lost our way.  Ah, but there is hope...  our tools are ever present... all we have to do is apply them and we are back on track...  practicing discernment...  setting boundaries...  practicing self care...  and asking for help.  

We are truly blessed to be part of the recovery community...  supported in our quest for healthier relationships and a balanced life.  

The Trauma of Pandemic Fatigue

Feel like getting out?  

A strong desire to forget about precautions?   

Travel to another place to escape?  

Just have some fun...  see friends...  get drunk...  forget it all?

You’re not the only one...  we all feel it...  low level depression...  isolation...  lack of social interactions... lack of physical touch...  loss of interest in hobbies...  pastimes...  life seems one dimensional...  dull...  no spark...  nothing to look forward to with a long winter ahead and the only light at the end of the tunnel is a vaccine available in the spring of next year...   ~sigh~

Does it help to know you’re not alone?  The world is once again facing a raging pandemic infecting in excess of 600,000 daily...  currently 55 million cases worldwide...   more than 1.3 million souls lost...  more than 11 million right here in the US...  with over 135,000 deaths.  

Of course we are overwhelmed...  frightened...  fatigued.  Our defense mechanisms... in an attempt to protect us from the devastation surrounding us...   gives us a false sense of security when we are with people we love and trust...  folks we see frequently...  “they couldn’t possibly get me sick”...  in our effort to deal with reality our defenses lie to us.   

This is the essence of pandemic fatigue.   Our cerebral cortex, usually capable of discerning truth from fiction, has left the party and we are in the hands of our old brain...  our reptilian brain...  the part of us that reacts to stress and trauma via fight, flight, or freeze.   Well...  the bad news is we can’t fight a virus with fisticuffs or verbal tirades...  we can’t flee... no where to go.  So, we freeze...  our feelings...  our sensibilities and our capacity for self care.  Just the opposite of what we need to do to survive.  

There is a way out...  reaching out to others...  we are all in the same boat...  talking with a counselor who can help...  pursuing simple tasks that require small effort for big rewards (baking bread)...  getting some fresh air and exercise by taking a walk (mask on!) or raking leaves...  volunteering to help others in a way safe for yourself...  journaling...  practicing gratitude...  remembering that this time will eventually pass and that others have survived pandemics before us...  and finally remembering that people we love depend on us to practice self care and stay safe so they can hug us when this is all over 😷💕

Stress, Fear, Isolation and Tools During a Pandemic

It’s been a long time since I have posted to this blog...  more than a year...  and what a year it has been.  

A mad election season coming to a close in just 20 days...  a pandemic that has killed over 205,000 Americans thus far... and is seemingly getting worse with no clear end in sight.  It feels as though reality has been turned upside down and inside out.

How do we practice self-care during times of great stress?  Tools become lifelines as we feel overwhelmed...  frightened...  lonely...  and stressed all at once.   Trying to fight the fear and stress can lead to an inability to function.  We are better served by making a plan to protect ourselves and those we love...  preparation is key.  Purchasing supplies for upcoming needs...  taking time for self care...  maintaining healthy eating habits...  getting much needed outdoor activity...  making sure we get sufficient rest.   All these areas of care are vital...  especially now.

Purchasing supplies for upcoming needs...   hand sanitizer...  disinfectant...  paper products...  masks...  dry food goods that store well...  medication supplies...  vitamins and minerals...  all these items stored carefully and safely decrease stress levels.

Taking time for self care...  daily showers or baths...  personal grooming...  wearing clean clothing...  socializing safely via video chat or phone conversations...   utilizing social media in helpful ways such as pursuing  hobbies or interests with a group of like minded individuals...  making fun videos to share with friends...  watching humorous films that provide comic relief...  engaging in hobbies that require significant engagement and concentration...  playing games with family members.

As an example...  during this pandemic I have set up and maintained a greenhouse...  a hobby I have enjoyed on a smaller scale for many years, that has blossomed into an avocation.  Beside the benefit of growing produce that we consume, the greenhouse has become an oasis of peace and calm where I can relax and enjoy away from the problems of the world.  

Each of us must find our own way during this time of crisis and stress...  some way to hold on to our unique gifts and translate them into a path forward... not just for ourselves...  but for humanity at large.  We all have something valuable we can contribute to making our world a better place...  we each must find our own piece of the puzzle that fits into the larger vision.

A single nasturtium flower in brilliant scarlett blooms in an unlikely place in mid October 2020