Feeling Greedy?

It's always a difficult time when someone we love passes away. We feel pain inside where there used to be wholeness. We hope that in time the pain of grieving will pass and we will feel whole once again. What happens to us when greed takes over our family after a tragedy? How do we cope with the ensuing drama and chaos that threatens to stall us in our grieving process?

We may experience losing a loved one as a crisis. The pain of loss, comfort, support and safety is too great to bear. This may lead to acting out grief through greed. Often times when a loved one passes away there may be infighting among family members trying to grab a share of the pie. This type of activity can stall the grieving process. The daily drama directs energy away from allowing feelings to progress naturally through the stages of grief. We may end up stuck in one of the five stages, denial, anger, bargaining or depression. Our goal is to attain the fifth stage, acceptance, but our journey may be frought with difficulties when bickering takes the place of solace and empathy.

If we are not permitted the chance to feel and process our pain and loss we may become unable to move forward with our lives. We may shut down our feelings and become numb. We may opt for self medication, abusing alcohol, drugs, gambling, sex or food. We may make hasty decisions that do not reflect our usual ability to respond rather than react. Our inability to process our grief may affect every area of our lives from our health to our relationships.

We may behave in abrasive and insensitive ways when we are filled with pain and sadness. We may become absorbed in our loss and attempt to grab more than our share of the estate of our loved one in an attempt to fill the gaping wound we feel inside. We must come to realize that no amount of things or funds will replace the person we have lost. The pain will not be mitigated by filling our lives with trinkets. The loss is real and we must come to terms with it. This will only happen as we permit ourselves to move through all the stages of grief.

Creating a diversion of drama over assets may take our mind off our loss for a time, but eventually we will be faced with the enormity of the fact that our loved one has passed on. If we delay our process we will only increase the amount of time it takes us to become whole once again.

Our most healthy choice is to reach out for support from those who love us and are willing to stand by us during our time of trial. We can attend support groups at local area hospitals, called bereavement groups. They are designed to help us get through our loss by encouraging the expression of feelings that come to us during the processing of grief. We are supported by others who have also lost loved ones and are traveling the same road.

Our lives may become quite tumultuous following the death of a family member. We must take time out for self care. Especially if we are responsible for the care of remaining family, it is imperative that we make the committment to ourselves to use our tools, practice self care on a daily basis, reach out for support to our network and higher power, and allow ourselves time to process our own feelings. If we need to attend a bereavement group, it is a gift we give ourselves. We do whatever we can to soothe those around us, giving ourselves the same soothing in the process. Life will return to balance in time. We must learn the art of acceptance.

A wise woman once said: "The hardest part about life is accepting reality when we don't like it."

Is It Already Too Late to Save Ourselves?

Yesterday was April 26th. It was sunny and about 85 degrees outside in New York City. Although we all enjoyed the early summer day it was worrisome. Today was the warmest day on record. Watching a science briefing on the results of the recent arctic studies cemented the concerns.

The sea ice in the arctic is melting faster than the scientific models have predicted. There is new evidence that we could see a complete melting of sea ice in the summer months only about five years from now. The melting of the sea ice would cause the earth's Arctic Ocean to heat up faster, as ice reflects the sun's rays back into space like a mirror whereas the oceans absorb heat. That would warm the arctic region releasing vast amounts of methane trapped in the currently frozen permafrost. Methane is a greenhouse gas with a much greater capacity for heat retention than carbon dioxide. This could heat up our planet to uninhabitable levels in some areas.

The Greenland ice sheet is the largest fresh water reserve in the world, next to Antarctica. It is currently melting faster than scientific models have predicted as well. The melting of this glacial area could cause a substantial rise in the water level of the earths oceans leaving coastal areas permanently under water. The estimated rise in the water table of earth's oceans has been estimated to be as much as twenty feet.

Additionally, adding that much fresh water could cause a dilution in the salinity of the seas, slowing or stopping the North Atlantic Current. This current is responsible for bringing warm sea water from the southern Atlantic Ocean up through Nova Scotia and across to Europe where it ultimately cools and returns to the southern seas. Without this pattern, the southern seas would become warmer and warmer. This current is responsible for the moderate temperatures that North America and Europe currently enjoy. Without those moderating currents, the Northern hemisphere would be substantially colder than it is now.

The increase in the temperature of the southern seas, due to the cessation of the North Atlantic Current, would spawn more super storms all over the world (eg: hurricanes Katrina, Rita and Ike). We could have arid areas experiencing extreme water shortages as well as other areas that suffer massive flooding. Permanently flooded coastal areas could resettle large populations inland causing additional drains on already scarce resources.

There are viable solutions to address the increased carbon dioxide dilemma. We have the technology to produce enough power from renewable energy sources right now. We need funding from government and private industry to create a cleaner future. It is time for corporate greed to be replace by the vision of a habitable planet for our children and grandchildren. We must act within the very near future to save humanity from the devastation that may follow further increases in greenhouse gas levels. It will not matter to our children that they have a balanced budget if they don't have a planet upon which they can live. We must invest in clean energy and solve this crisis before it is too late.